What Shall We Call Ourselves? Last Names Among Lesbian,Gay, and Heterosexual Couples and Their Adopted Children

ABSTRACT

Choices of last names for both adults and children are important family decisions that are often made upon marriage or upon the birth of a child. The gendered nature of such choices among heterosexual populations is well known, but they have not been widely studied among lesbian or gay populations. We studied selection of last names among 106 adoptive families—27 headed by lesbian couples, 29 headed by gay couples, and 50 headed by heterosexual couples—all of whom had adopted children at birth or in the first weeks of life. Whether in selection of last names for adults or for children, we found that heterosexual adoptive couples were more likely than lesbian and gay adoptive couples to follow patronymic conventions. Thus, heterosexual parents and their children were most likely to have identical last names. For lesbian and gay couples, in contrast, the most common scenario was for both adults to retain last names given to them at birth and hyphenate them to create last names for their children. Parents in lesbian and gay couples offered more detailed explanations of their choices than did those in heterosexual couples. Explanations offered by heterosexual parents were most likely to refer to tradition, but those given by same-sex parents were more likely to mention egalitarian or practical considerations. Overall, we found that same-sex and other-sex couples took very different approaches to the problem of naming themselves and their children.     

Issues of shared parenting of LGBTQ children and youth in foster care: preparing foster parents for new roles

Foster parents have increasingly assumed new and challenging roles during the past decade. Meeting the developmental, attachment, and grieving needs of children and youth in out of home care is challenging by itself, but can become even more difficult with the issues that arise when the child is lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or questioning (LGBTQ). Preservice and in-service foster parent training programs can strengthen shared parenting skills by focusing on the universal critical issues of safety, well being, and permanence for children and youth in foster care. This article will focus on these skill areas: (1) sharing parenting to promote healthy growth and development of LGBTQ youth in foster care, (2) threats to safety of LGBTQ youth in foster care, and (3) general challenges and strategies for preparing foster parents of LGBTQ youth to build support systems.     

A Comparative Analysis of Adoptive Family Functioning with Gay,Lesbian, and Heterosexual Parents and Their Children

Abstract

The objectives of this comparative study were to examine adoptive family functioning with a sample of gay, lesbian, and heterosexual adoptive parents and their children. The results suggested that parent sexual orientation is not a significant predictor of adoptive family functioning, adopted child's behavior, and parent's perceptions of helpfulness from family support networks. Furthermore, a regression analysis suggested the following variables were associated with higher levels of family functioning: adoptive parents who were previously foster parents and children who had more previous placements prior to adoption. Lower family functioning was associated with children adopted through CPS; with children who had mental health diagnoses, learning disorders, or other handicapping conditions; and with children who were in a higher grade in school. The results of this comparative study of adoptive families support the need for more methodologically rigorous research that includes gay and lesbian adoptive parents along with heterosexual parents.     

Assessing lesbian and gay prospective foster and adoptive families: a focus on the home study process

Foster care and adoption by gay men and lesbians is not a new phenomenon. Children and youth have always been placed by states and public agencies in homes with gay and lesbian parents. Some gay men and lesbians have fostered or adopted children independently from private agencies or have made private adoption arrangements with individual birthmothers, while others have fostered or adopted through the public system. Drawing on research literature, practice wisdom from 31 years of child welfare experiences, and case examples, this article offers child welfare professionals guidelines for competent assessment with prospective foster or adoptive parents who identify as lesbian or gay.     

Learning Difference

SUMMARY

This paper explores some of the relationships between the ways in which (White) dominant group children learn about racial differences and the ways in which difference is represented within gay and lesbian families. Research in the latter area has typically provided two dominant (though contrasting) accounts of difference within gay or lesbian families: (1) that children of gay or lesbian parents will have a better understanding of difference; and (2) that there are no significant differences between heterosexual and gay or lesbian families. In order to explore the implications of this current research in regards to constructions of difference within predominantly White gay and lesbian families, an analysis of storybooks aimed at children with gay or lesbian parents was conducted. The findings suggest that representations of difference within such books often reinforce a White heterosexual norm for parenting. To counter this, it is proposed that a shift is required in research focusing on gay and lesbian families, the intent being both to examine the simultaneous ways in which race privilege and sexuality-based discrimination shape the lives of White lesbian or gay parents and to broaden the scope of research in this area to more adequately reflect the diverse communities it seeks to represent.     

Parent-Child Interaction Styles Between Gay and Lesbian Parents and Their Adopted Children

SUMMARY

While myths exist that call into question the parenting ability of gay and lesbian parents as well as the impact of such parenting on children in their care, there is an ever increasing body of literature that clearly demonstrates the capabilities of these parents with their birth children. However, there continues to be a dearth of research on gay and lesbian adoptive parents and their children. To address this deficiency in the literature, this article explores the parenting styles of gay and lesbian adoptive parents and strengths of their children between the ages of 5–9 years (N = 94), using scores from the Parent-as-a-Teacher Inventory and the Behavioral and Emotional Rating Scale. Results illustrate that the gay and lesbian adoptive parents in this sample fell into the desirable range of the parenting scale and their children have strength levels equal to or exceeding the scale norms. Finally, various aspects of parenting style significantly predicted the adoptive parents' view of their child's level of care difficulty which subsequently predicted the type and level of strengths assessed within their adopted child. Recommendations for practice, policy and future research are highlighted.     

COLAGE

Abstract

COLAGE (Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere) is a national, non-profit organization run by and for children who have one or more gay, lesbian, bisexual, and/or transgender (GLBT) parents. Our mission is to engage, connect, and empower people to make the world a better place for children of GLBT parents and families. This article chronicles COLAGE's work within the context of the larger GLBT-family movement. A review is made of the emotional and socio-political challenges that children of GLBT parents face, as well as the benefits and unique perspectives gained from growing up in a family outside of the social norm. Finally, COLAGE is conceptualized in terms of its prominence as a community based intervention for building networks, empowering youth, and ensuring society recognizes, validates, and celebrates all families.     

The Attitudes of Australian Heterosexuals Toward Same-Sex Parents

SUMMARY

This is the first study of attitudes of Australian heterosexuals toward heterosexual, gay male, and lesbian parents and the children raised by these parents. A sample of Australian heterosexual males and females read one of six vignettes describing a family situation. Participants assessed the parents' emotional stability, responsibility, and competence; how loving, sensitive, and nurturing they were; the amount of quality time they spent with their child; and their ability to be good role models. Results indicated participants held negative attitudes toward gay male and lesbian same-sex parents. Participants believed that children raised by same-sex parents are more likely to experience confusion over their sexual orientation and gender identity, more likely to be homosexual, and more likely to experience strained peer relationships as well as stigma and teasing than children raised by heterosexual parents. Level of sexual prejudice was the key predictor of attitudes toward same-sex parents and the expected outcomes for their children. Being male, older, and having fewer children were additional predictors of attitudes towards same-sex parents, whereas being older and less religious was associated with expected negative outcomes for the children. Substantial attitudinal shifts are required before gay male and lesbian parents and their children are fully accepted into Australian communities.     

Children of Lesbian and Gay Parents

ABSTRACT

The purpose of this paper is to review the research literature concerning the development of children with gay and lesbian parents. It begins by discussing some of the social, theoretical, and legal implications of studying this population, and critiques a number of the assumptions guiding this research. The review then proceeds to include studies on children of divorced lesbian and gay parents, as well as studies conducted on children of gay and lesbian families that are planned. The body of literature generally concludes that children with lesbian and gay parents are developing psychologically, intellectually, behaviorally, and emotionally in positive directions, and that the sexual orientation of parents is not an effective or important predictor of successful child development. The paper also includes a discussion of the limitations of these studies, provides suggestions for future research, and discusses the challenge these families pose for the meaning and definition of family.     

Growing Up with a “Spoiled Identity”

Abstract

Being a lesbian, gay or bisexual youth means having the stigma of homosexuality or bisexuality. A stigma is anything that discredits an individual and leads to one being assigned a “spoiled identity.” With reference to lesbian, gay and bisexual youth, the stigma is considered a blemish on one's character that often leads to stereotyping and stigmatisation. This homophobia puts many lesbian, gay and bisexual youth at risk for suicide, chemical abuse, dropping out of school, verbal and physical abuse, homelessness, prostitution, HIV infection, and psychosocial developmental delays. Approaches and strategies for working with lesbian, gay and bisexual youth are suggested and trends and issues about homosexuality in the United States, with a potential impact on lesbian, gay and bisexual youth, are discussed.     

The Comparison of Grandparents’, Parents’, and Young People's Attitudes Toward Lesbians and Gay Men in Turkey

ABSTRACT

The present study aimed to compare attitudes toward lesbians and gay men across three generations in Turkey. Participants were 112 young people, 169 parents, and 125 grandparents. A total of 406 men and women were involved. The short form of Herek's (1998) the Attitudes Toward Lesbians and Gay Men Scale was used. MANOVAs and ANOVAs were used to analyze the data. Results showed the attitudinal differences toward gay and lesbian people across generations. Grandparents have the most negative attitudes, whereas parents have more negative attitudes than their children. When comparing attitudes of each generation across sex, we found that young women have more liberal attitudes toward gay men compared to all other groups. Discussion focuses on understanding the results within the unique cultural context of Turkey.     

Lesbian and Gay Youth's Aspirations for Marriage and Raising Children

ABSTRACT

One hundred and thirty-three lesbian and gay youth were interviewed about their interests in long-term relationships, same-sex marriage, and becoming parents. One-third of the males and one-half of the females considered future long-term relationships extremely important; 61% of the males and 82% of the females expected such relationships to be monogamous. One-third of the males and two-thirds of the females said they would very likely marry. Only 14% of the males and four females were disinterested in raising children. Counselors working with lesbian and gay youth should explore youth's expectations for relationships and for child-rearing.     

Teachers' Views of Students with Gay or Lesbian Parents

Eighty-three female and 24 male teachers responded to an anonymous questionnaire exploring four aspects of teachers' views of students who have gay or lesbian parents: (1) exposure to and general knowledge about homosexuality, (2) attitudes towards gays and lesbians, (3) interactions with gay or lesbian parents, including school practices and policies, and (4) beliefs about problems experienced by students with gay and lesbian parents. Most teachers knew some gay males and lesbians, had limited education and knowledge about homosexuality, and possessed moderately tolerant attitudes towards gays and lesbians. They believed that students with gay or lesbian parents had more problems in social interaction but were more mature, tolerant, and self-reliant than other students. Open-ended questions about gay and lesbian parents and their children revealed a wide range of answers, ranging from very supportive to noticeably hostile.     

Different Storks for Different Folks

SUMMARY

When gay and lesbian couples decide to become parents, they are unique as a group in always requiring the involvement of a facilitating other: a donor, surrogate, or (in the case of adopted or foster children) birth parents. This clinical paper explores common psychological and social challenges gay and lesbian couples face when using alternative reproductive technologies to attain parenthood. Between the wish and the actuality of being at home with their baby, gay and lesbian parents travel a long and winding road of choices and chances taken. The parenting partners often consist of one biological and one non-biological parent. Issues of psychological/emotional parenthood as opposed to merely biological parenthood (including assumptions of potential inequality or differential legitimacy) must be reconciled in the minds, couple relationships, family of origin relationships, and friendship support systems of the partners before and after the child's birth. The family must also navigate others' questions and assumptions as they venture ever further beyond their intimate circle and as their growing child forms relationships with peers. Specific guidelines are offered for helping couples surmount these psychosocial challenges.     

A Study of Attitudes Towards Gays and Lesbians in the State of Utah,U.S.A.

Abstract

The purpose of this study was to examine Utahans' attitudes towards gay and lesbian people and their civil rights. Utah politics are dominated by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (the Mormons) and the Republican Party, with membership typically shared by the two. However, Mormon sociocultural values are also distinctively pro-family and companionate. We wondered to what extent caring, warmth, and inclusiveness toward family members mitigated against the doctrinaire injunction to reject homosexuality and, if necessary, to reject family members who were homosexual.

We found that proponents of gay and lesbian civil rights were likely to be personally familiar with gays and lesbians, to have empathetic attitudes about gay and lesbian youth and being out, and to possess a commitment to legal rights for gay and lesbian individuals and families. Opponents of gay and lesbian civil rights were driven by moralistic imperatives about sexuality and the roots of sexual behavior, made a sharp distinction between what they perceived as social privileges and legally mandated rights and were not likely to have had much direct contact with gay and lesbian people. Our results suggest that Utahans indeed appear to be torn, or at best ambivalent, about the religious mandate to condemn homosexuality while at the same time prizing family ties and relationships above other values. For the same reasons, political actions directed at obtaining specific legal rights for gays and lesbians appear to have more support than expected, especially in the realms of partner benefits, employment discrimination, health benefits, and private freedoms. Legal marriage, however, is soundly rejected as a possibility, especially in view of the belief that marriage is sacred and exclusively for heterosexuals.     

A Qualitative Analysis of Cultural and Social Vulnerabilities to HIV Infection Among Gay,Lesbian, and Bisexual Asian Youth

Abstract

The study reported here was undertaken to investigate cultural and social barriers that may increase HIV risk among gay, lesbian, and bisexual Asian youth. Interviews and focus groups were used to collect the data because they are well suited for this type of exploratory research. A total of 15 gay, lesbian, and bisexual Asian youth (7 females and 8 males) were recruited. Most of the participants (n = 11) self-identified as lesbian or gay. The mean age was 20.7, ranging from 17 to 24. Twelve participated in one of three focus groups while the remaining three were interviewed. Categories and themes identified include: (1) the lack of sex education at home, (2) homophobia in Asian families, (3) unresponsive health and social service providers, (4) lack of social support, (5) negative stereotypes, (6) ideal standards of beauty, and (7) negative perceptions of safer sex practices among Asian lesbian and bisexual women. HIV prevention strategies are suggested based on the recommendations and needs of our participants.     

Parents' Experience of Feeling Socially Supported as Adolescents Come Out as Lesbian and Gay: A Phenomenological Study

Discovering that an adolescent is lesbian or gay is often experienced as a family crisis. Feeling bereft of social support during times of such emotional upheaval and transition may precipitate states of despondency for parents, placing both children and parents at risk. While social support has been discussed as a key mediating agent for psychosocial stress in many areas of parenting, there has been minimal focus on parents of lesbian and gay youth. This phenomenological study explores eight parents' experience of feeling socially supported as they approach living with their adolescents' coming-out. The emergent, thematic structures comprised two dimensions of experience: those prompting social isolation and those creating social reconnection. Translating this knowledge into practice innovations offers ideas for relevant and responsive outreach.     

Support Networks of Gay Male and Lesbian Youth

The support networks of 90 self-identified urban gay male and lesbian youth (ages 14 to 21 years) are examined. The youth, who are predominantly black and Latino/a, indicated an average of eight persons in their support networks, most of whom were close friends. Other significant groups included were parents, siblings, other relatives, and lovers or partners. A large majority of the support network members knew that the youth were gay or lesbian. Youth were moderately to very satisfied with the support they received from the network members—being more satisfied with the support provided by those who knew of their homosexuality compared to those who suspected or were unaware. Nonetheless, most youth felt that they did not have enough friends, and that they often to seldom felt lonely. These two feelings correlated positively with suicide ideation and attempts; and feeling lonely also correlated positively with drug use.     

After coming out: Parental acceptance of young lesbian and gay people

This study examines extant scholarly knowledge on parental acceptance of young lesbian and gay people in traditional heteronormative families. Recent literature shows that parents generally accept their lesbian and gay children. However, parents do not always accept them immediately after they come out. Acceptance takes time, and transitioning to acceptance is often a complex process that depends on parents' access to the necessary resources for coping with the stresses of knowing that their child identifies as lesbian or gay. These resources include counseling or therapy, supportive friends and extended family, and a network of other parents with lesbian and gay children. This study also highlights the need for further research on parental acceptance in nontraditional families and of children with other nonheterosexual identities, such as asexuality, gray ace, bisexuality, or pansexuality. It also calls for an exploration of the complexities of parental acceptance as an ongoing process rather than as a singular event.     

Out of the Darkness: Three Waves of Family Research and the Emergence of Family Therapy for Lesbian and Gay People

Like family relationships themselves, the history and treatment of lesbian and gay people and their families is complicated. For this paper, three waves of research on the families of gay and lesbian individuals are described. During the first wave, gay and lesbian sexual orientation was seen as a disease and family dynamics were blamed for its genesis. Subsequently in the second wave it was believed that, fearing rejection many gay and lesbian people either distanced or were rejected from their own families and established friendship networks that have been described as families of choice. More recently, in the third wave, the family has been identified as a resource for lesbian and gay youth whereby open relationships with parents can help protect them from mental illness, substance abuse, and HIV risk. Furthermore, an increasing number of same-sex couples are choosing to become parents, overcoming biological and social obstacles. In this article these shifting views of the role of family in the lives of lesbian and gay people will be described along with case material that illustrates the historic influences, current developments and future directions of family treatment for this population. To be maximally effective with gay and lesbian people and their families, clinical social workers and other mental health professionals must understand how family therapy has been influenced by a progression of ideas that continue to evolve. In this paper, research examining the role of the family in the lives of lesbian and gay people will be described in three waves; as a source of blame, to an impediment to gay and lesbian happiness and ultimately a resource that can enhance lesbian and gay well-being. The influences of research on family therapy with this population will be described and case examples will demonstrate how to harness the strengths of family relationships identified in the most recent wave.