The Dying Mother

In a culture where concerted attempts are being made to postpone or circumvent inevitable processes of human life, the poignancy of a mother diagnosed with cancer provides a platform from which to explore broader cultural understandings of mothering. This paper examines four films that contend with the theme of mothering with terminal cancer. Despite being made decades apart and for different audiences, the films share seemingly unchanging representations of mothers. They are portrayed as having a choice between dying as “good” mothers or risking being labeled as unfit mothers. Instead of using cancer as an opportunity to become better selves (as expected of others who are dealing with cancer), dying mothers are expected to find better selves for their children. In the process they must learn the difficult lesson that they are required to both sacrifice all for their children and acknowledge being imperfect as mothers, that is, being replaceable as mothers. Young mothers, in particular, are assumed to be incapable of being good mothers.