Dimensions of Intimacy: The Interrelationships between Gender and Listening

In the introduction to their text on intimate relationships, Perlman and Duck (1987, p. 9) note that psychologists, sociologists, family scientists and communication experts “are all making important contributions” to the study of personal relationships, thereby reflecting the recent multidisciplinary aspect of this field. However, in many important works on intimacy and intimate relationships, the gender differences that often create barriers to intimacy, and how these differences are reflected in the communication process, have, until recently, been notably absent.¹ While alluded to repeatedly, nowhere, in fact, is the connection directly made between intimacy and the listening behavior of women and men. This paper therefore attempts to fill this absence by integrating into the literature on intimacy the salient aspects of listening that affect the quality of intimate relationships between women and men. Hopefully, such understanding will contribute to our knowledge of the concept of intimacy in our culture and will facilitate razing the barriers to intimate relationships that are a product of cultural expectations.