Shame in Self and Society

This article proposes that shame is the master emotion of everyday life but is usually invisible in modern societies because of taboo. A review of shame studies suggests a taboo that results in denial and silence. The studies by Cooley, Freud, Elias, Lynd, Goffman, Lewis, and Tomkins have been largely ignored. Their work suggests a vital connection between shame and social life: shame can be seen as a signal of a threat to the bond. If so, understanding shame would be necessary for the study of social systems. The taboo on shame in English still holds: current usage, for the most part, assigns an intense and narrow singular meaning. This meaning offends, on the one hand, and misses the everyday function of shame, on the other. Perhaps the problem can be approached, as it is in traditional societies, by the use of a broader term, such as “bond affect” or “Shame.” Such a concept could lead to discovery of the emotional/relational world.     

Cultures of Denial: Avoiding Knowledge of State Violations of Human Rights in Argentina and the United States

Why and how do individuals distance themselves from information about their government's participation in torture and other human rights violations? Such citizen (non)response implicitly legitimates and thus facilitates the continuation of abusive state actions. Drawing on a model of socially organized denial, we explore how sociocultural contexts and practices mediate individuals’ avoidance, justification, normalization, silencing, and outright denial of human rights abuses in two sites: Argentina during the last military dictatorship (1976–1983) and the United States during the “war on terror” post September 11, 2001. The study is based on 40 in‐depth interviews with members of diverse civic, religious, community, and political organizations in both countries (20 in each site). Comparing the political circumstances of a dictatorship and an electoral democracy, the analysis shows the roles of patriotic and national security ideologies and practices of silence and talk as organizers of cultures of denial.     

Multifunctional teasing as a resource for identity construction in the talk of British Bangladeshi girls1

This paper explores how multifunctional teasing is used as a resource for the construction of linguistic identities, establishing a link between previous research on teasing and the field of language/discourse and identity. I draw on a corpus of 38 episodes of teasing contained in 80 minutes of spontaneous talk between five adolescent Bangladeshi girls who formed a friendship group at their comprehensive school in East London. The qualitative analysis of the data reveals that the teasing in this group can serve four main functions: an accomplishment of fun‐based solidarity; a release of underlying tensions; a display of toughness; but also a display of respect for other speakers’ dispreference for taboo subjects. Building on Ochs’(1992) notion of indirect indexicality my discussion of the data will focus on the social meanings of these different functions of teasing which range from maintaining and managing friendship to (re)negotiating class and culture‐related identities. I shall argue that the identity work achieved by and in the teasing needs to be seen in relation to stereotypical notions and ideologies about class, gender and culture‐specific (language) practices which shape the girls’ construction of themselves as British Bangladeshi working‐class adolescents.     

Sexist talk: Gender categories,participants’ orientations and irony

This paper uses a discursive social psychological approach to develop and extend what we know about the constitution of sexist talk. Using data from a variety of sources where the topic under discussion is gender and leisure, I examine actual instances of sexism in action. Specifically, I examine the ways in which participants use arguments about possible injury to justify women’s non–participation in certain sport and leisure activities. I identify three resources that participants use to sustain sexist accounts, and bolster their arguments against attack. A fourth resource problematises just what counts as sexist talk, and provides evidence for the ways in which participants themselves can exploit sexist arguments in an ironic fashion to expose and challenge sexist assumptions. I end by considering the implications of this approach for future work on sexist talk, and discursive work on the relationship between gender and language more generally.     

Social Relations Model Analyses of Perceived Self‐Control and Trust in Families

How do people know which family member is trustworthy? In this study, the authors tested the hypothesis that people use their perception of a family member's self‐control as an indicator of his or her trustworthiness. Eighty‐four Dutch families consisting of 2 parents and 2 children completed questionnaires assessing each family member's trust in and perceived self‐control of the other 3 family members. This full‐family design enabled the authors to examine their hypothesis in horizontal relationships, between family members of equal status (i.e., parent–parent and sibling–sibling relationships), and vertical relationships, in which partners have unequal status (i.e., parent–child and child–parent relationships). Consistent with the hypothesis, Social Relations Model analyses showed that being perceived as having higher self‐control is related to greater trustworthiness among adults and children in the large majority of horizontal and vertical relationships (10 out of 12). These findings highlight that perceived self‐control is an important factor by which to gauge trustworthiness in families.     

Sequences of toddler negative emotion and parent–toddler verbal communication during a waking day

Although the second year of life is characterized by dramatic changes in expressive language and by increases in negative emotion expression, verbal communication and emotional communication are often studied separately. With a sample of twenty‐five one‐year‐olds (12–23 months), we used Language Environment Analysis (LENA; Xu, Yapanel, & Gray, 2009, Reliability of the LENA? language environment analysis system in young children’s natural home environment. LENA Foundation) to audio‐record and quantify parent–toddler communication, including toddlers’ vocal negative emotion expressions, across a full waking day. Using a multilevel extension of lag‐sequential analysis, we investigated whether parents are differentially responsive to toddlers’ negative emotion expressions compared to their verbal or preverbal vocalizations, and we examined the effects of parents’ verbal responses on toddlers’ subsequent communicative behavior. Toddlers’ negative emotions were less likely than their vocalizations to be followed by parent speech. However, when negative emotions were followed by parent speech, toddlers were most likely to vocalize next. Post hoc analyses suggest that older toddlers and toddlers with higher language abilities were more likely to shift from negative emotion to verbal or preverbal vocalization following parent response. Implications of the results for understanding the parent–toddler communication processes that support both emotional development and verbal development are discussed.     

Totem and Taboo in Sociology: The Politics of Affirmative Action Research*

The thesis is advanced that sociology's strong links with welfare-state liberalism have also led to the widespread acquiescence to “liberal taboos” regarding some topics of social research such as affirmative action. The relationship between sociology and liberalism is examined. Radical and neoconservative influences are also noted. Adverse encounters with affirmative action taboos by intellectuals and social scientists are discussed as is the “fashionable” consensus on affirmative action in sociology. That this consensus may sometimes be shallow and relatively uninformed is suggested by reactions by the author's Southern California colleagues regarding his proposed studies of (1) the extent of widespread public discussion of affirmative action in the 1970s. and (2) the social psychological impact of such policies upon white males. The paper concludes with a discussion of related taboos in sociology and other fields and the dangers involved in ideological allegiances. I'm not saying that cities are doomed places, but I will say that the hard core of the welfare society is doomed. There are no prospects for these people. Nobody ever took the trouble to teach them anything. They live in a kind of perpetual chaos, in a great noise. And, you know, they really are startled souls. They cannot be reasoned with or talked to about anything. Isn't it time for us to admit this? For a long time, the subject lay under a taboo. Nobody was going to talk about it. Now people are beginning to do so. Though I consider myself a kind of liberal, I have to admit that the taboos were partly of liberal origin. It was supposed to be wrong to speak with candor. But lying in a good cause only aggravates disorder. –Saul Bellow (1982) We had best remember that socìology and ideology are competitors …–Alvin Gouldner (1976)     

MANAGING GUILT:

In this article I illustrate the connections between talk, emotion management, and identity. In much of the recent work on collective, discursive strategies such as narrative and rhetoric, this link is left implicit. Through the study of a support group for parents of "troubled" teenagers, I highlight how parents' rhetorical talk created an emotional pathway that enabled them to maintain their good-parent identities despite their teenagers' rebellion. Parents used a personal responsibility rhetoric to make sense of their teenagers' misbehavior. For the most part as parents applied the personal responsibility rhetoric, they followed meeting protocol. Occasionally, however, parents violated the rhetoric's expression rule that parents were to avoid talking about guilt. I address how parents collectively constructed meeting discourse and conclude that their use of the personal responsibility rhetoric was how they collectively managed their own and each others' emotions. As a result they set the stage for becoming strict disciplinarians, which made it possible to see themselves as good parents, regardless of their teenagers' rebellion.     

Season of light/season of darkness: The effects of burying and remembering traumatic sexual abuse on the sense of self

This paper considers the disruptive effects of defensively forgetting childhood sexual abuse on the sense of self. Defense analysis, leading to access to and control of affects and associated recall of forgotten events is a crucial aspect of understanding and treating the resulting self disorders. The defenses of dissociation, denial and repression will be considered with regard to some of the basic effects on the sense of self which come from employing them. A case discussion illustrates the strengthening of the sense of self of a patient with a profoundly traumatic past when these defenses are systematically disrupted through psychotherapy.This paper was originally presented as the keynote address on the psychoanalytic track at the Federated Societies for Clinical Social Work meeting in Chicago in September of 1991. The author would like to thank the organizers of that conference and, in particular, the members of the program committee of the Committee on Psychoanalysis, chaired by Rosemary Gaeta, for their invitation to present.The author would also like to thank many friends and colleagues for their help in preparing this paper. In particular, Dr. James Masterson, Dr. Eleanor Grayer, Andrea Stone, MSW, Dr. Shelly Nagel, Dr. Stephen Reed and Stewart Clark, took the time and trouble to make many helpful comments. In addition, I would like, in particular, to thank Dr. Candace Orcutt, whose thinking about trauma and dissociative states has had a profound influence upon my work.     

Gender Differences in Emotion Expression in Low-Income Adolescents Under Stress

Gender roles in mainstream US culture suggest that girls express more happiness, sadness, anxiety, and shame/embarrassment than boys, while boys express more anger and externalizing emotions, such as contempt. However, gender roles and emotion expression may be different in low-income and ethnically diverse families, as children and parents are often faced with greater environmental stressors and may have different gender expectations. This study examined gender differences in emotion expression in low-income adolescents, an understudied population. One hundred and seventy nine adolescents (aged 14–17) participated in the Trier Social Stress Test (TSST). Trained coders rated adolescents’ expressions of happiness, sadness, anxiety, shame/embarrassment, anger, and contempt during the TSST using a micro-analytic coding system. Analyses showed that, consistent with gender roles, girls expressed higher levels of happiness and shame than boys; however, contrary to traditional gender roles, girls showed higher levels of contempt than boys. Also, in contrast to cultural stereotypes, there were no differences in anger between boys and girls. Findings suggest gender-role inconsistent displays of externalizing emotions in low-income adolescents under acute stress, and may reflect different emotion socialization experiences in this group.     

Looking‐Glass Self: Goffman as Symbolic Interactionist

My thesis is that for most of his career, Erving Goffman was a symbolic interactionist in the Cooley line. The only sustained theoretical structure in Goffman's work before 1974 follows Cooley's conjecture of the looking‐glass self. Cooley assumed shared awareness, that we “live in the minds of others.” He also realized that shared awareness is virtually invisible in modern societies and proposed pride or shame as the emotions that resulted. Goffman emphasized embarrassment over shame and implied a fourth step beyond Cooley's three: the management of embarrassment or shame. The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life is dense with these emotions. Goffman proposed conceptual definitions of the embarrassment and shared awareness that are central to Cooley's idea. The conjunction of shared awareness and emotion in Goffman's examples may be the main feature that arouses reader sympathy. Two hypotheses are formulated here, along with techniques that might be used to test or apply them.     

‘I am not poor. Poor children live in Africa’: Social identity and children's perspectives on growing up in contexts of poverty and deprivation in the Netherlands

This study focuses on problems children living in contexts of poverty face in daily life and how they perceive poverty. Findings are based on research with children (8–12 years) from impoverished areas in the Netherlands. Besides the problems as identified by the children, such as the poor quality of playgrounds and the lack of money for activities, we identified a striking paradox, namely the taboo on or denial of poverty versus the pervasiveness of poverty. To understand and handle this contradiction, we reflect on representation of children growing up in contexts of poverty through a social identity framework.     

Face-to-Face Interaction with Government Officials and Its Effects on the Political Attitudes on the Civil Society Organizational Members: The Study from Japan

This study attempts to answer the question: When do civil society organizations (CSOs) function as a bridge between the informal political sphere and the formal political sphere by changing the political attitudes of their members? To answer this question, I used the Japanese General Social Survey 2003 (JGSS 2003). My main findings involve the effect of the face-to-face interactions that the CSO members have with government officials. The findings suggest that while CSO members without such interactions are no more psychologically politically engaged than non-members, the members with such interactions are. The findings have an empirical importance to those who study Japan since the country is currently undergoing CSO–government relationship reform and the number of CSOs is growing rapidly in the recent years. The study also has a theoretical importance to civil society scholars since this study attempts to unfold the mechanism in which CSOs’ positive effects on the members’ political attitudes are produced.     

Relationship Dynamics,Emotion State,and Domestic Violence: A Stress and Masculinities Perspective

We draw on the burgeoning masculinities literature to develop a framework for understanding how emotional reactions to stress may be associated with domestic violence. We conducted a daily diary study of 22 men with a history of domestic violence and a matched comparison group of 23 men with no known history of domestic violence. Each day, respondents completed a daily diary questionnaire on relationship dynamics, stress, and emotion state. This research design allowed us to examine relationship dynamics and emotion state as they unfolded over a 14‐day period. We find a difference between the two groups in the links between stress, relationship dynamics, and emotion state: Nonviolent men are more emotionally reactive to stress and relationship dynamics than are violent men. Among men with a history of domestic violence, it is as if the link between personal circumstances and emotion state has been disconnected. These findings support the idea that the demonstration of masculinity through repression of emotion and violent behavior may be linked.     

SHARING EXPERIENCES:

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a world-wide fellowship for mutual help for persons suffering from addictions and alcohol problems. This article addresses a pragmatic aspect of the therapeutic process taking place in the weekly AA meetings. At meetings, AA members 'share' their personal experiences, but they also recurrently refer to previous turns of talk in order to make their own experiences recognizable, understandable and 'shareable'. This study is about these 'co-contributor references', and about the work AA members do to create mutual, 'therapeutic' relevance for their 'monological' turns with these references. This article is a conversation analytical study of tape-recordings of actual AA meetings in Finland. Mutual references are a technique through which members can both manage topic shifts and accomplish solidarity between members in mutual help group, and constitute greatly variable relations between speakers as individuals. As a whole, the article explicates members' methods for sharing and co-constructing experiences whereby mutual help is achieved as a practical accomplishment.     

How Is Religiousness Associated With Adolescent Risk‐Taking? The Roles of Emotion Regulation and Executive Function

Existing literature has demonstrated an association between higher adolescent religiousness and lower risk‐taking via higher self‐regulation. This study sought to elucidate the roles of emotion regulation and executive function as parallel mediators in the link between religiousness and risk‐taking in a sample of 167 adolescents (mean age = 14.13 years, 52% male, 82% White at Time 1). Longitudinal results across three waves utilizing structural equation modeling indicated higher religiousness was associated with higher emotion regulation, whereas religiousness was not associated with executive function. Subsequently, higher emotion regulation and executive function were associated with lower risk‐taking. Emotion regulation mediated the association between religiousness and risk‐taking. The findings highlight religiousness as a contextual protective factor for adolescents.     

Laughter,the Best Mediation: Humor as Emotion Management in Interaction

Recent work in emotions and emotion management suggests that humor is a social phenomenon and serves an important purpose in interaction. That is, humor can be viewed as interpersonal emotion management, whose purpose is to manage the emotions of others as well as of the self. This article offers the following definition as an analytical tool: humor as emotion management is an expert cultural performance; which strengthens or restores the feeling norms of the situation and creates amusement in the self and others; generating positive sentiments among members of an interacting group by bonding them and/or reducing an external threat; often at the expense of some excluded person(s), event(s), or object(s).     

Family Social Work: The Past and the Present

SUMMARY

It is easy to blame the dysfunction of a family member on his or her behavioral patterns. I use the title, “It's the Relationship, Stupid!” not to talk down to family therapists, but to remind myself that the source of dysfunction is usually family relationships, especially the marriage relationship. This article gives several case studies for practical application of therapy techniques that focus on developing the “WE” of the family unit. One practical technique that I developed is a communication typology. The married couple (and family members) are divided into “Painters” and “Pointers.” This typology explains much of the conflict and mis-communication that leads to the breakdown of the “WE.” This article also presents dysfunction within the individual as a relationship problem and introduces the concept of the “spirit” of the individual as expressing the relationship the person has with self.     

“People Want to Protect Themselves a Little Bit”: Emotions,Denial, and Social Movement Nonparticipation*

Emotions can be a source of information and an impetus for social action, but the desire to avoid unpleasant emotions and the need for emotion management can also prevent social movement participation. Ethnographic and interview data from a rural Norwegian community describes how people avoided thinking about climate change in part because doing so raised fears of ontological security, emotions of helplessness and guilt, and was a threat to individual and collective senses of identity. In contrast to existing studies that focus on the public's lack of information or concern about global warming as the basis for the lack of public response, my work describes the way in which holding information at a distance was an active strategy performed by individuals as part of emotion management. Following Evitar Zerubavel, I describe this process of collective avoiding as the social organization of denial. Emotions played a key role in denial, providing much of the reason why people preferred to avoid information. Emotion management was also a central aspect of the process of denial, which in this community was carried out through the use of a cultural stock of social narratives that were invoked to achieve “perspectival selectivity” and “selective interpretation.”