Disrespect,Tension, and Togetherness-Apartness in Marriage*

For a study of marital togetherness and apartness, the partners in 136 couples completed questionnaires. The role of disrespect, a factor that might serve as an abrasive in marriage, was investigated. Couples above average on disrespect spent more time apart on days when there had been a big fight, considerable annoyance, or anger; couples below average on disrespect spent more time together on days when there had been a big fight, considerable annoyance, or anger. This finding suggests that therapy for couples with a presenting problem of insufficient contact may first have to deal with abrasive factors.     

Toward a Greater Understanding of the Cohabitation Effect: Premarital Cohabitation and Marital Communication

The goal of the present study was to examine the relationship between premarital cohabitation experience and marital communication in an effort to understand the robust finding known as the cohabitation effect, whereby couples who cohabit before marriage have greater marital instability than couples who do not cohabit. Observed marital problem solving and social support behavior were examined as a function of premarital cohabitation experience in a sample of 92 couples in the first 2 years of their first marriages. Spouses who cohabited before marriage demonstrated more negative and less positive problem solving and support behaviors compared to spouses who did not cohabit. Sociodemographic, intrapersonal, and interpersonal functioning variables did not account for the association between cohabitation experience and marital communication.     

The transition to marriage

Cohabitation has often been viewed as easing the transition to marriage. The question is therefore asked, what characterizes relationships in which couples live together for an extended period of time prior to marriage, then decide to marry, and within two to three years are divorced? Four groups were interviewed (cohabitated/married; cohabitated/married/divorced; dated/married; dated/married/divorced) with the hope of analyzing the differences or similarities in the marital transitions made by individuals within these groups. The total sample consisted of 40 respondents who were given an in-depth, face-to-face interview. It was found that the degree of congruence between dyad members regarding perceptions and expectations surrounding marriage and marital life was an important factor in the success with which couples were able to make the marital transition.     

Marital Therapy, Retreats, and Books: The Who, What, When, and Why of Relationship Help-Seeking

When doubts creep in and marriages begin to falter, where do couples turn for assistance? In a longitudinal study of 213 couples over the first 5 years of marriage, results indicated relationship help‐seeking was relatively common, with 36% of couples seeking some form of outside help during this period. Individual and relationship difficulties predicted increased use of relationship books and marital therapy in the following year; therefore, these behaviors appear to be important outlets for relationship assistance. In contrast, attending marriage retreats/workshops was related only to demographic variables. Results of the present study suggest that the most common types of relationship help‐seeking by community couples are understudied and likely underutilized in the dissemination of empirically based marital interventions.     

Commensal careers at entry into marriage: establishing commensal units and managing commensal circles

Commensality is eating with others, and marriages are among the most significant commensal relationships. We collected qualitative data about commensality and entry into marriage from twenty couples using two in‐depth interviews, the first at about the time couples entered marriage and the second about one year later. Commensal eating was an important component of the courtship process. Entry into marriage marked a transformation in people's commensal careers in which their marital relationship became their primary commensal unit. Meal commensality varied across the daily cycle: Many spouses skipped breakfast or ate breakfast separately, most ate lunch at work, and dinner was the main commensal meal. Greater marital commensality occurred on weekends than weekdays. Partners managed involvement in extra‐marital commensal circles by combining their former eating networks. Kin were major participants in commensal circles, with friends, co‐workers, and neighbors also included as eating partners. Overall, commensality was an important component of the way people ‘do marriage’.     

Spillover Patterns in Single-earner Couples: Work,Self-care,and the Marital Relationship

The relationship between work and marriage is well documented in dual-earner couples. Work-marital spillover patterns, however, have been understudied in single-earner couples. The current study extends the work-marital spillover literature by examining spillover patterns from individual experiences and self-care behaviors to the marital relationship over a period of 42 days in husband-earner and wife-earner couples. Results of pooled time-series regression analyses indicated individual experiences and self-care behaviors predicted marital processes for both employment groups. For self-care behaviors, however, different patterns emerged for employed and unemployed spouses. Results identify an important connection between energy depletion and marital processes, and highlight the role of a spouse’s own and the partner’s self-care behaviors, particularly for the employed spouse in single-earner couples.     

Relationship quality in long-term marriages: A comparison of high quality and low quality marriages

The purpose of this paper is to examine the relationship dynamics in long-term marriages. Proposive samples of marriage enrichment couples and marital and family therapy client couples married for 40 or more years are compared with regard to level of marital quality. Composite case studies are presented to illustrate differences in marital styles of the two groups. A typology is constructed which identifies relationship dynamics variables that differentiate high quality and low quality marriages.The author would like to express appreciation to Anna L. Cole, M.S., who is a Marital and Family Therapist in private practice in Ames, Iowa, for her helpful comments. This research was supported in part by the Iowa State University Home Economics Research Institute during the writing of this paper.     

The Relationship Between Cohabitation and Marital Quality and Stability: Change Across Cohorts?

The relationship between premarital cohabitation and marital dysfunction was examined with a total sample of 1,425 spouses in two U.S. marriage cohorts: those married between 1964 and 1980 (when cohabitation was less common) and those married between 1981 and 1997 (when cohabitation was more common). Spouses in both cohorts who cohabited prior to marriage reported poorer marital quality and greater marital instability. When selection factors for cohabitation and subsequent marital instability were included in the statistical model, cohabitors in both cohorts continued to exhibit poorer marital quality and greater marital instability. These findings lend stronger support to an experience of cohabitation perspective than to a selection perspective as an explanation for why couples who cohabit before marriage tend to have more troubled relationships.     

Marital Quality and Spouses' Marriage Work With Close Friends and Each Other

Through in‐home interviews with 142 married couples, we explored how husbands' and wives' marriage work with close friends and one another was linked to their perceptions of marital quality. Results showed that husbands engaged in more marriage work with their wives than with close friends, whereas wives engaged in similar levels of marriage work with their close friends and husbands. For wives, marriage work with their spouses was found to moderate the relationship between marital quality and marriage work with friends. At low levels of marriage work with their spouses, wives' marriage work with friends was negatively related to their reports of marital love and positively related to reports of ineffective arguing. In contrast, at high levels of marriage work with their husbands, no significant relationship was found between wives' marriage work with friends and marital quality for wives. Findings underscore the role of spouses' friendships and suggest that the strength of spouses' ties to one another is linked to the social context they and their close friends create.     

The Social Ecology of Marriage and Other Intimate Unions

This article provides an interdisciplinary framework for studying marital and other intimate relationships. Three levels of analysis are distinguished: (a) the society, characterized in terms of both macrosocietal forces and the ecological niches within which particular spouses and couples function; (b) the individual spouses, including their psychosocial and physical attributes, as well as the attitudes and beliefs they have about each other and their relationship; and (c) the marriage relationship, viewed as a behavioral system embedded within a larger network of close relationships. The discussion focuses primarily on the interplay between the spouses and their marriage, emphasizing the importance of distinguishing, both analytically and operationally, the individual from the dyadic (or group) levels of analysis. It is also argued that in order to appreciate how marriages work, social scientists must understand not only how these 2 levels of analysis interpenetrate each other but also how macrosocietal forces and the ecological niches within which couples live impinge on partners and their marital relationship.     

Mexican American and Other Hispanic Couples’ Relationship Dynamics: A Review to Inform Interventions Aimed at Promoting Healthy Relationships

Public policy initiatives have set out to promote healthy relationships among low-income racial and ethnic-minority couples. Interventions used, however, are based on decades of research with primarily White, middle-class, college-educated couples and have yielded disappointing results. The aim of this literature review is to provide the reader with the current state of knowledge on relationship dynamics among the fastest growing ethnic-minority group in the United States: Mexican American (MA) Hispanics and other Hispanic subgroups. Thirty-seven empirical journal articles focusing on the following domains of interest were reviewed: (1) patterns of union formation and dissolution, (2) ideals and views about marriage, (3) relationship satisfaction and quality, (4) communication and conflict, and (5) unique themes. MA couples have higher marital rates, a decreased risk of marital dissolution, and report greater relationship satisfaction than African American couples. First-generation and less acculturated MA couples have a decreased risk of experiencing marital dissolution and dissatisfaction than second- and third-generation MA couples. Cultural variables such as family values and religion seem to play an important role in MA and other Hispanic couples’ relationship satisfaction and stability. In the interest of enhancing the effectiveness of intervention efforts directed at these couples, future research should focus on elucidating the mechanisms by which acculturation impacts MA couple functioning, examining the impact of other facets of relationship quality (e.g., emotional intimacy, support) on marital satisfaction, broadening samples to include other Hispanic subgroups, and exploring the types of services and method of delivery that MA and other Hispanic couples would like to receive. Limitations and strengths of the existing literature are discussed.     

Love attitude and marital adjustment in the family life cycle

The present study examines husband and wife perceptions of attitude toward love and marital satisfaction through seven family life cycle stages. A significant relationship was determined between husbands’ and wives’ attitude toward love and marital satisfaction for couples in the early years of marriage with no children, and for couples with children in the preschool years. Marital satisfaction and attitude toward love seem to function more independently of one another in the other family life stages. Overall, husbands vary slightly more than wives on marital satisfaction and attitude toward love, but the pattern for both is similar in that each relationship is curvilinear.     

STRUCTURED SEPARATION FOR MARITAL TREATMENT AND DECISION-MAKING*

Structured marital separation is an intervention method designed to assist distressed marital couples during their critical period of decision-making either to divorce or maintain the marriage. This paper presents a brief review of separation models and addresses separation counseling including: assessment, contracting, initial adjustment to separation, relationship enhancement and individual change. Particular attention is given to the terms of marital separation contracting and a complete sample contract is provided.     

Vasectomy: its effect upon marital stability.

50 couples were studied as to whether vasectomy had any effect on marital stability, communication, and sexual satisfaction. The procedure of the study is described and all results are tabulated. Demographic data on the couples indicate a general trend toward the mid-20s in terms of couples making the decision in favor of vasectomy. The couples seemed to have a stable marital history and to have made the decision earlier in marriage than was previously the case. The average number of children among the couples was 2. An average increase in coital frequency resulted from the vasectomy. Improved stabilization of the marriage and improved sexual satisfaction also resulted. Little change was noted in marital communication, understanding, and affection as a result of the vasectomy.     

Generosity and the Maintenance of Marital Quality

This study examined whether generosity in marriage was associated with marital quality. The authors conceptualized generosity as a type of relationship maintenance behavior and used data from the new Survey of Marital Generosity (a national survey of married couples, N = 1,365 couples and 2,730 total participants). They found that generosity—defined here as small acts of kindness, displays of respect and affection, and a willingness to forgive one's spouse his or her faults and failings—was positively associated with marital satisfaction and negatively associated with marital conflict and perceived divorce likelihood.     

PREDICTING MARITAL SUCCESS WITH PREPARE: A PREDICTIVE VALIDITY STUDY

In order to determine the predictive validity of the premarital inventory PREPARE, this study assessed the utility of PREPARE inpredicting marital success. A 3-year follow-up study was conducted with 164 couples who took PREPARE during their engagement. As hypothesized, it was found that satisfied couples scored significantly higher on the inventory than dissatisfied couples, divorced couples, and couples who cancelled their marriage. It was also hypothesized and found that dissatisfied married couples did not differ significantly from couples who cancelled their marriage or those who divorced. Using discriminant analysis, it was found that the PREPARE scores from 3 months before marriage could predict with 80–90% accuracy which couples were separated and divorced from those that were happily married. These findings not only demonstrate the predictive validity of PREPARE, but its potential utility in identifying high-risk couples who could benefit from more intensive premarital counseling.     

Investments in Marriage and Cohabitation: The Role of Legal and Interpersonal Commitment

Cohabiters have been shown to invest less in their relationship than married couples. This study investigated the role of legal and interpersonal commitment by examining heterogeneity within marital and cohabiting unions. Going beyond the dichotomy of cohabitation versus marriage, different union types were distinguished by their level of legal and interpersonal commitment, followed by an assessment of their association with joint investments (specialization, having children together, purchasing a home). Using panel data from The Netherlands (N =2,362), the authors found considerable heterogeneity within marital and cohabiting unions. Joint investments increased as interpersonal commitment increased, with cohabiters without marriage plans investing the least and couples who directly married without prior cohabitation investing the most. The relationship between investments and legal union types was less straightforward and often challenged expectations, prompting the authors to elaborate on alternative explanations for their findings.     

Techniques of Handling Anger in Marriage

This paper endorses David Mace's (1976) recommendations for dissipating anger in marriage, presents a rational-emotive theory of anger, and derives from this theory of number of cognitive-behavioral methods of minimizing anger between marital partners.     

DYSPHORIA AND MARITAL DISCORD: ARE DYSPHORIC INDIVIDUALS AT RISK FOR MARITAL MALADJUSTMENT?

The effect of dysphoria on husbands' and wives' later marital adjustment was examined in a sample of 264 white couples about to marry who responded to advertisements. Relationship satisfaction and level of dysphoria were assessed in both spouses prior to marriage, 6 months after marriage, and 18 months after marriage. Premarital dysphoria was associated with later marital dissatisfaction. Husbands' premarital dysphoria, regardless of chronicity, was associated with greater deterioration in both their own and their partners' marital satisfaction. Wives' premarital dysphoria was associated with greater deterioration in marital satisfaction only if it was chronic. Results suggest that premarital dysphoria is associated with subsequent deterioration of marital relationships.     

Wann werden Ehen getrennt?

With regard to marriages, numerous studies have reported a time-dependent course of the dissolution rate, which is characterized by an initial rise and a subsequent decline after a couple of years. The article at hand discusses potential explanations for the correlation of marital duration and the risk of dissolution and examines them on the basis of the Family Survey 2000. The results indicate, among other things, that the concentration of childbirths in an early stage of marriage leads to a slow-down of the initial rise of the dissolution rate whereas it weakens its later decline as the stabilizing effect of shared children on marriage decreases when the children become older. There are significant differences with respect to the dependency of the dissolution risk on marital duration between the successive marriage cohorts, depending on the wife’s occupation, age at marriage as well as between couples who did vs. those who did not cohabitate before marriage. The results suggest that relationship-specific processes as well as changes of the marital preconditions resulting from the partners’ respective ages contribute to the explanation of the course of the dissolution rate.