“He Was Supposed to be With Me for the Rest of My Life”: Meaning-Making in Bereaved Siblings’ Online Stories

The present study applied relational dialectics theory to explore the competing discourses that animate bereaved siblings’ online stories about their loss, as well as to understand how the interplay of these discourses constitutes meaning of sibling bereavement. Analysis of over 70 message board postings retrieved from online support groups revealed two main discursive struggles that characterize siblings’ experiences of grief and loss: grieving as deviant behavior versus grieving as a normal process and the deceased as gone forever versus the deceased as still present. These findings illuminate the challenges bereaved siblings face as they attempt to mourn their deceased brother or sister and make sense of their grief within a societal context that oftentimes forgets or overlooks how traumatic it can be to lose a sibling.     

The “Replacement Child”: On Adoption,Haunting, and the Unlived Life

What does it mean to live in the shadow of an older sibling’s unlived life? This study draws on notions of haunting, guilt, fantasy, and envy to explore the experience of the “replacement child.” Art Spiegelman’s (1986) Maus tells the story of what it was like to occupy the place of his older brother, who died during the Holocaust. This is intertwined with my own account of adoption and replacement. The dead sibling is perceived as a ghostly presence, shaping the possibilities of who and what the “replacement child” will become.     

Predictors of Heterosexual Siblings’ Acceptance of Their Lesbian Sister or Gay Brother

Research has shown that lesbian and gay (LG) individuals are coming out not only to their parents, but also to their siblings. Eighty percent of individuals in the United States are raised with one or more siblings; however, researchers have frequently underestimated the importance of the sibling bond. This study examined potential correlates of heterosexual siblings’ acceptance of their LG sister or brother using an online survey format (N = 189). In addition, psychometric properties for the Acceptance of Sibling Sexual Orientation Scale are provided. Results revealed that greater sibling relationship quality in adulthood, more contact with LG individuals, greater knowledge of LG communities, more support for LG civil rights, and various demographics (being female, having higher educational levels, not having an orthodox/fundamentalist religious orientation, less church attendance, and more liberal political ideology) are related to heterosexual siblings’ acceptance of their LG sister or brother. However, when these variables were examined together in a regression model, only sibling relationship in adulthood, contact with LG individuals, support for LG civil rights, and religious attendance were significant unique predictors of acceptance.     

The aborted sibling factor: A case study

The number of abortions in the world is steadily increasing, and there are now millions of children who have survived the abortion of a sibling. There is increasing evidence that even very young children may be aware of maternal abortions despite family attempts to maintain secrecy. For those children experiencing other powerfully unresolved conflicts, the abortion of a sibling may trigger a severe reaction. A case is presented in which it gradually became clear that a 5-year-old girl's withdrawn regression was related to her mother's multiple abortions and her own fear of being destroyed through maternal aggression.     

Group therapy with sexually molested children

It should be stressed that the young children's group was only a part of the overall treatment approach that forms the family context of the Child Sexual Abuse Treatment Program. Because the therapists also work with entire families, they have come to accept that the child is not the only victim. Often the mothers and fathers in this program were themselves victims of sexual assaults when they were children, and have carried this victim roles with them into adulthood. A child growing up in this family system will learn the victim role well. Her denial and/or fear of sexual aggression, as well as her role models for parenting, will perpetuate the cycle and make the sexual abuse of her own children a distinct possibility. The play therapy treatment seeks to break this cycle and restore the young child victim's self-respect by teaching new skills and providing different role models. The therapy seeks to help her tap her own power to become an adequate adult. Such therapeutic "undoing" or self-reconstruction is a long process which probably takes as many paths as there are victims. Adults victimized as children frequently report periods of repression and denial, and it is likely that direct treatment of the child victim, when the incest comes to light, mitigates against development of such repression. The natural healing process must be respected. The child needs time to integrate the experience and its painful aftermath. Changing and healing do not take place all at once, or after one period of intervention. Therefore one important aspect of such therapeutic work is to give the child victims the tools to reach out for help and support in the future, when the pain of this early childhood experience may once again be an obstacle to growth.     

Dreams as Empirical Data: Siblings' Dreams and Fantasies About Their Disabled Sisters and Brothers

Until recently, most experts in the area of dreams and dream analysis held the view that dreams must be analyzed and worked with by professionals in the area of psychoanalysis or psychology, or by sleep experts. For sociologists, subjective, nonquantifiable topics such as dreams and daydreams were not considered valid areas of inquiry. But these areas can provide a way-of-knowing that has not been explored; these nighttime visions can contribute a new source of data about issues that deeply concern people. This article uses dreams and conscious daydreams about disabled brothers and sisters as an example of the type of information that could be gleaned if we used dreams as empirical data. Siblings of disabled individuals, originally recruited for another research project, were queried about their dreams and fantasies of the disabled sister or brother. In the respondents' dreams (both awake and sleeping) a number of themes emerged: issues that came up only when they discussed their dreams. These themes seem connected with the waking reality of having a disabled siblings; they include: (1) previews of anticipated experiences, (2) a desire to be a savior and, consequently, to be respected for rescuing the handicapperl person, (3) a wish to have the handicapper sibling escape from the dilemma of disability, (4) the notion that someone or something (a fairy godmother) will change things, (5) sorrow about the disability or death, and (6) guilt that they were “normal” and the sibling was disabled.     

School Based Vision Centers: striving to optimize learning

As the average age of the Canadian population continues to increase, and providing care at home to frail older adults becomes ever more prevalent, support for family and friend caregivers remains a key social policy issue. Economic support is an important consideration given the impact of caregiving on labour force participation. Yet the caregiving/paid work relationship is not always straightforward. While caregiving often restricts employment, limited attachment to employment may also influence the decision to provide care. Isabel's story, collected as part of a study of sibling views of fairness in sharing parent care as well as parent assets, provides a case study in how siblings give different priority to care work versus career work and what support needs arise including those related to sibling conflict over differing priorities. Isabel claims she sacrificed her career to care for her ailing mother while her siblings argue that through caregiving, Isabel was sheltered from the paid workforce.     

Reflections on the Work of Professor Selma Fraiberg

This paper reviews the work of Professor Selma Fraiberg who became a leading figure in the field of infant mental health. Born in 1918 she first received an MSW in Social Work and then undertook her Analytic Training in Detroit Michigan. While she maintained her identity as a social worker throughout her life, she integrated insights from the fields of social work, psychoanalysis and developmental and ego psychology in her research and practice. This paper traces her development as a clinician, researcher, and educator. Three cases describe her ability to integrate social work methodologies with analytic insights. The cases describe the treatment of a latency age child at a time of social change, a clinical research study of the developmental risk of children blind from birth, and a groundbreaking study in the field of infant mental health. Her study of infants at developmental risk focused on the parent /infant relationship and parents were included in the treatment process so that they could become more attuned to their young child. Her work highlighted the intergenerational issues that shaped the parental capacity for empathic nurturance between parent and child. The article Ghosts in the Nursery incorporated the major theoretical concepts of the new theoretical approach to treatment and is still much read in graduate programs today. Although extensive new research has added to the field of infant mental health, her contributions are still relevant to research and practice today.     

Sibling Incest Dynamics: Therapeutic Themes and Clinical Challenges

Increasing empirical evidence points to the prevalence and devastating effects of sibling incest. The dynamics of incestuous sibling relationships are complex and typically embedded in severely dysfunctional families. Often confused and/or distressed by their incestuous experiences, many victims fail to disclose the abuse. Left undisclosed and untreated, unresolved issues of mutuality and consequent shame and guilt can lead to life-long emotional problems and dysfunctional behavioral patterns that are difficult to repair. Two cases illustrate common therapeutic themes, the importance of timely disclosure and coordinated, multi-dimensional treatment approaches, as well as the therapeutic challenges of assisting sibling incest victims who present for treatment as adults.     

Experiences of Younger Siblings of Young Men in Prison

Whilst the detrimental effects of forced separation through incarceration have been explored in the context of parent–child relationships, little is known about the social and psychological impact of having a sibling in custody. The present research was carried out in order to develop a better understanding of the needs and experiences of children who have a sibling in prison and is based on an interpretative phenomenological analysis of the accounts of eight young people (age 9–17, mean = 13 years) with an older brother in custody. The interviews revealed a series of themes, including the emotional response to a sibling being taken into custody, a reluctance to disclose information to teachers and peers, and perceptions of own behaviour in the light of the sibling's experiences of the criminal justice system. Findings are discussed in relation to policy implications and recommendations for those working with young people, and suggestions are made for future research directions.     

Sibling group treatment

This paper examines a model of treatment for working with sibling groups. It is suggested that the sibling group is rarely considered as a viable treatment entity, yet siblings potentially exert a powerful influence within the family system. Assumptions underlying this model of treatment are examined. As a unit of treatment, sibling groups can be worked with in three ways: (1) as an adjunct to family or adult treatment, (2) as an adjunct to individual child therapy, and (3) by itself. Treatment objectives are described and a case illustration is provided. Finally, limitations and benefits of sibling group treatment are discussed.     

Telephone sessions in the treatment of a child during the therapist's absence because of threatened miscarriage

This paper concerns a specific experience during the treatment of an eleven year old boy when the therapeutic work was interrupted by the therapist's threatened miscarriage which confined her to bed. The patient had been traumatized at about the age of four when a younger sibling was born. Following the birth of the sibling the mother became depressed and was hospitalized for close to a year. Accordingly, the therapist's illness reevoked the patient's early trauma serving to fuse the original event with the interruption of the current treatment. This afforded an opportunity for demonstrating to the patient the persistent effects of the first trauma and the evidence of the unconscious fantasies deriving from it. Under the circumstances it was decided to continue the treatment by telephone.     

Native Daughter: Home,Segregation, and Mental Maps

ABSTRACT

Narrow mental maps, those that present a blinkered, overly simplified view of reality, are believed to play a role in the development of prejudicial attitudes and behaviors. But what about when such maps happen to be held by members of disadvantaged groups? This paper examines the mental map of “home” held by an African-American girl who lived in a racially segregated community outside Chicago during the Depression. It finds that her map was not a simple, single construct, but consisted of overlapping, interpenetrating landscapes of sights, sounds, places, and feelings. Perhaps surprisingly, while her map was detailed and complete, it did not acknowledge the segregated nature of her family's neighborhood. The article suggests that her map served a defensive purpose, protecting her from the indignities of being a conscious victim of discrimination. It concludes that while narrow maps might indeed feed the prejudices of members of dominant groups, they may operate as instruments of empowerment among the oppressed.     

Being missed and missing: An interactional element of separation/individuation

The intent of this paper is to demonstrate as a therapeutic use of self the selective communication of the therapist's own feelings as enabling a patient to experiencemissing. I focus here on work with a patient who urgently and primarily presented unmourned (unintegrated) separation and loss in her history, in her self and object relations, and thus in her relationship with me. I propose that the therapist's feelings, in so far as they reflect an interactional aspect of the normal separation/individuation process may serve as a basis for expressive, interactive participation by the therapist.     

The renovative aspect of psychoanalytic reconstruction in psychotherapy

Reconstruction of the origins of present day psychic phenomena constitutes an essential component of psychoanalytically oriented treatment. The clinician seeks to help restore to the patient a picture of the past and to correct or revise those early impressions that have been distorted as a result of cognitive immaturity or altered by the employment of defense, fantasy, or compensatory adaptations. It is this renovative aspects of reconstruction which will be elaborated upon, drawing from the treatment of a borderline woman who, since childhood, had overly employed the autoerotic resources of her body to compensate for missed object experiences. Ultimately this effort came to block her development, distort organization, and compromise self valuation. By tracing her polymorphous perversity in adulthood back to its origins, it was possible to enable her to regard her responses to chronic childhood trauma in a new light. This in turn aided in the revision of the predominantly negatively coloured self representations, leading to more positive development in the narcissistic sphere of her personality.     

Meeting God: When Organizational Members Come Face to Face with the Supreme Leader

This paper focuses on a theme which features innumerous organizational stories, in whichan ordinary member of of an organization comes face toface with the organization's top leader. This themeechoes not only the archetypical religious scene ofmeeting God as supreme judge, but also severalwell-known scenes in drama, opera, and literature.Through a psychoanalytic study of this theme, a set ofprimal phantasies projected by organizational membersonto their leaders are explored. The paper also throwsinto sharp relief the underlying asymmetry of therelationship between leader and follower: while the follower may shake the leader's hand once, theleader will shake innumerable hands. The paper is basedon a detailed interpretation of three narrativessupplied by students, drawn from 6-month industrial placements (internships) which they undertookas part of their studies. In the first narrative, astudent describes her encounter with the leader inalmost religious terms as a liminal moment in her life; the student idealizes the leader who serves asa role model. In the second narrative, the student feelsshunned by a leader who is inadequately briefed for hismeeting with her; she proceeds to demonize the leader as well as the entire organization.In the third narrative, a student loses his faith in hisdepartmental head, when he realizes that he is not trulyindependent bur merely follows directives from above. The three narratives are used toidentify four core fantasies about the lader: (1) theleader as someone who cares for his/her followers; (2)the leader as someone accessible; (3) the leader as someone who is omnipotent and omniscient;and (4) the leader as someone who has a legitimate claimto lead others. Two groups of follower fantasies arethen examined. The charismatic and the messianic. It is then suggested that the leader may beseen as a reincarnation of the primal mother, restoringthe members narcissism and rewarding them for who theyare rather than for what they have achieved.Alternatively, the leader may be envisioned more closely tothe Freudian image of father substitute, who rewards andpunishes, arousing at once fear, loyalty, jealousy, andsuspicion. It is suggested that the former is close to Kohut's account of charismaticleadership fantasy, while the latter is closer to hisaccount of messianic leadership fantasy.     

The healing power of dogs: Cocoa's story

Animals bring a sense of "at homeness" and even normalcy to people who are hospitalized or live in health care facilities. Illnesses, separation from family, fear, loneliness, and even depression may be lessened for those who receive a therapy dog visit by providing a welcome change in routine and something to look forward to. Individuals are often more active and responsive during and after a visit. Just stroking and petting a dog requires the use of hands and arms, as well as the motions of stretching and turning. Dogs are also unconcerned with age or physical ability; they accept people as they are. This alone causes many to reach out and interact with dogs. Animals provide a focus for conversation and a common interest. As Cocoa's human partner can attest, a pet also makes it easier for strangers to talk. Cocoa is known by so many people at the facilities she visits that residents' family members often stop to talk with "Cocoa's mom" when they meet her in the community, asking questions about how Cocoa is doing. When Cocoa is no longer able to perform her services, many in her community will mourn. Cocoa's story, as well as the limited research literature, supports the positive physical and psychological effects of animals, but continued research on the effect of therapy animals on health outcomes is needed. As advocates for clients, nurses are in key positions to facilitate the inclusion of animals in clients' care. Although not for everyone, including those who react negatively to animals or who are allergic, pet therapy offers important possibilities for providing holistic care that extends not only to clients, but also to family members and staff, and to the pets themselves.