“He Was Supposed to be With Me for the Rest of My Life”: Meaning-Making in Bereaved Siblings’ Online Stories

The present study applied relational dialectics theory to explore the competing discourses that animate bereaved siblings’ online stories about their loss, as well as to understand how the interplay of these discourses constitutes meaning of sibling bereavement. Analysis of over 70 message board postings retrieved from online support groups revealed two main discursive struggles that characterize siblings’ experiences of grief and loss: grieving as deviant behavior versus grieving as a normal process and the deceased as gone forever versus the deceased as still present. These findings illuminate the challenges bereaved siblings face as they attempt to mourn their deceased brother or sister and make sense of their grief within a societal context that oftentimes forgets or overlooks how traumatic it can be to lose a sibling.     

Every Object Tells a Story

ABSTRACT

The article considers objects and stories within the homes of Pakistani Heritage families who came from Pakistan to the UK in the 1950s and 1960s. The research team particularly explored the relationship between objects and family stories and timescales. Part of the research process involved an ethnographic inquiry exploring the stories told by the families. An exhibition was constructed from these stories and a website. The experience of migration, of the resettling of people and objects produced new kinds of stories in relation to objects, as families moved across national and transnational spaces. I highlight how a nuanced understanding of timescales can help illuminate studies of home cultures of migrant families. Notions of place and space are disrupted when possessions are left behind, and language is all there is left to recreate lost objects in old spaces. Longer timescales can be attached to objects that appear valueless when actual objects are lost or in transit. By making the timescales a focus for discussion, actual stories and experiences of families making that transition can be more readily heard. Home cultures can be understood in this context as “traveling” and subject to transformation and disruption.     

Multiple social contexts in qualitative bereavement research

Little research focuses on the ways that bereaved family members react to and make meaning of their experience of the death of an elderly father and husband. In a qualitative, ethnographic study of 34 bereaved families we examined how family members respond to two inter-related social contexts: 1. social-cultural values and attitudes such as attitudes toward grieving for old persons, and 2. the inter-personal dyadic relationship between interviewer and interviewee. An underlying theme of uncertainty pervades the study participants' views of what is normal and expected in their own process of bereavement. Implications for future bereavement research are suggested.     

Constructing Couples’ Stories: Narrative Practice Insights from a Dyadic Dementia Intervention

Memory loss and dementia can be devastating for both caregivers and care recipients. Narrative therapeutic approaches offer promise, as well as challenges, for social interventions with couples where one partner has dementia. The Couples Life Story Approach is a recently-developed method by which practitioners work with such couples to help them narrate the story of their life together. This narrative approach is augmented by mementoes (e.g., photos, cards) that are collected by the couple during the intervention. Significant memories are elicited from both partners and developed into a Life Story Book. Drawing on data from this clinical research intervention with 20 older couples, we ask: What are some of the challenges of conducting narrative-based therapeutic interventions with older couples with memory loss? Clinical themes were identified utilizing a multiple case study approach during weekly team meetings. Six of the most prominent themes are presented here. Specifically, how to: (1) construct a narrative from disparate stories, (2) tell a mutual story, (3) tell the story of a couple that has been in a shorter relationship, (4) incorporate others in the story, (5) include difficult life moments, and, (6) end the story. Within each theme, we utilize case examples to illuminate relevant issues and describe strategies that were developed to resolve these clinical challenges. Implications for practitioners and clinical researchers who are engaged in dyadic interventions are discussed.     

"THERE ARE SURVIVORS": Telling A Story Of Sudden Death

This article is a personal narrative of a family drama enacted in the aftermath of my brother's death in an airplane crash. "True" stories such as this fit in the space between fiction and social science, joining ethnographic and literary writing, and autobiographical and sociological understanding. My goal is to reposition readers vis a vis authors of texts of social science by acknowledging potential for optional readings and encouraging readers to "experience an experience" that can reveal not only how it was for me, but how it could be or once was for them. This experimental form permits researchers and readers to acknowledge and give voice to their own emotional experiences and encourages ethnographic subjects (co-authors) to reclaim and write their own lives.     

When the Management of Grief Becomes Everyday Life: The Aftermath of Murder

This study examines how others indicate that our emotions violate social norms and how people feel about and respond to those indications. The data come from in‐depth interviews with thirty‐two people who had recently lost a loved one to murder (“bereaved victims”). Through the symbolic interaction process, bereaved victims came to appreciate the burden their grief imposed on others, and some of them took steps to minimize that burden. Despite their awareness of the burden, however, many of the bereaved expected others to express heartfelt sympathy for their loss. Instead, people offered inappropriate (and even hurtful) responses, including avoiding the topic of their loss, offering unnecessarily dramatic responses to the loss, and telling them to move on. The responses suggest that current feeling rules and emotion norms surrounding grief do not reflect the true extent of bereaved people's actual experiences, creating awkward situations for potential supporters and the bereaved.     

"NEIGHBORS WHO MIGHT BECOME FRIENDS":

HIV is a condition that seems powerfully to define identities and communities. In some cases it appears to have generated new, culturally and politically radical forms of both. Drawing on a series of interviews over two to three years with people infected or affected by HIV, this article examines how interviewees describe their communities and identities as determined by HIV, though in partial, limited ways. The article explores how the "self" operates in the interviews, not as a consistent, reflexive project but as an occasional, situated resistance. I argue that the narrative form of the interviews was what enabled provisional, variable identities and communities to be articulated. The "coming out" genre was widely deployed to describe negotiating HIV stigma and fatality, as well as accepting and to some extent disengaging from serostatus. This genre's allowance of incompleteness also gave a place to HIV's abjection, to horrors that cannot be storied into subjective meaningfulness. Finally, the article looks at how, rather than focusing on identities or communities, interviewees told stories of citizenship, of subject positions shaped by neighborhood, national and transnational, as much as individual or group concerns.     

The Effectiveness of Guided Mourning for Adults with Complicated Mourning

Loss of a loved one is a common experience. For the bereaved to grieve is a natural expression of the loss, and mourning is the process through which one must pass in order to adapt to the reality of the loss. For various reasons, for some the mourning process becomes complicated, and the bereaved gets “stuck” in the process and fails to return to living life unburdened by the loss. Practitioners need to be aware of interventions that are proven to be effective in addressing complicated mourning. Initial search began with experimental and quasi-experimental studies but ended up including four pre-experimental studies. The study included adults who are not known to be intellectually challenged but who have suffered the loss of a loved one as a result of natural (illness) or violent (homicide, suicide, fatal accident) circumstances. A total of seven studies were reviewed. Guided mourning can be effective in helping an adult move through the mourning process. It is, however, imperative that the practitioner understands the mourning process and what has prevented the bereaved from moving forward through the process. Given how common grief and mourning are in the human experience, there is surprisingly little research on what is effective in helping those whose mourning has become complicated. More needs to be done in this area, including clearly defining the specific components of guided mourning and the clients who will be best served by this intervention.     

Red balloon: approaching dreams as self-narratives

In this article, dreams are seen as stories within a self-narrative. Dream stories, like all other stories, are told in an effort to make sense of experiences. Here, dream content is linked to current concerns, some aspects of which are not given voice in waking. Dreams depict restricting themes but also openings in self-narratives. Several examples are provided of how dreams can be linked to early, middle, and late therapy phases associated with recognizing, challenging, revising, and maintaining a revising stance. It is further suggested that dream stories can be used to trace, facilitate, and evaluate the process of reconstructing self-narratives. Finally, a number of therapeutic interventions are briefly presented to facilitate the work of narrative-informed family therapists working with individuals, families, and groups.     

ADOPTION:

In this article, we focus on how understandings of the past influence the process of integrating older special needs children into family life. We present the stories of two families who adopted older special needs children as they reconstructed the past, experinced the present, and projected the future. We draw upon social, pragmatic, and postmodern theories of the past to guide our interpretations and understandings of these families' adoption experiences. The dominant ideology of family influenced their story construction, and it was against this conception that their stories were evaluated. We followed the Litners and the Becks as they used the past to create stories that enabled and disabled their family life in the present and in the future. From the Litners' and the Becks' stories, we learned that when families are too limited by a cultural conception of an ideal adoptive family, their ability to use the past to create stories to help them live in the present and to project a shared future becomes restricted.
Our adoption failed because we understimated the past and overstimated our ability to create stories with happy endings. (Mrs. Beck)     

Clinical Challenges Following An Adolescent’s Death By Suicide: Bereavement Issues Faced By Family,Friends, Schools,And Clinicians

Given the increasing prevalence of adolescent deaths by suicide, social workers are increasingly likely to be called upon to respond to traumatically bereaved families, peers, and possibly professional colleagues following an adolescents death by suicide. The authors discuss current trends in adolescent suicide. A stress diathesis model is applied to considering risk factors and their clinical implications following an adolescents death by suicide. Using a case scenario, the authors discuss clinical issues of complex bereavement following suicide, along with some suggestions for effective clinical follow-up with surviving families, peers, and professionals.     

FROM FOSTER CARE TO FOSTERING CARE: The Need for Community

Using an interpretive ethnographic framework, we investigate how being in a caring community benefits foster children and their families during a time of crisis. Through (re)telling the stories of the untimely death of Carl Connor, a parent of four foster children, we examine the community of Hope Meadows as the site where the activities of caring occurred. Care as a set of relational and moral practices is presented, and we describe how care is facilitated by the purpose as well as the physical and social dimensions of Hope Meadows. The stories of Carl Connor's death provide a foundation for a gendered theory of moral community.     

Crisis in a foster home: The need for a caring community

Using an interpretive ethnographic framework, we investigate how being in a caring community benefits foster children and their families during a time of crisis. Through (re)telling the stories of the untimely death of Carl Connor, a parent of four foster children, we examine the community of Hope Meadows as the site where the activities of caring occurred. Presenting care as a set of relational and moral practices, we describe how care is facilitated by the purpose, as well as the physical and social dimensions, of Hope Meadows. The stories of Carl Connor's death provide a foundation for a gendered theory of moral community.     

Twenty american families' stories of adaptation: adoption of children from Russian and Romanian institutions

The purpose of this qualitative study was to understand how 20 families have adapted after adopting children between the ages of 3 and 5 years from eastern European institutions. The researcher visited a Romanian orphanage and then interviewed 20 families about their experiences with the adoption process and with family adaptation postadoption. Several themes emerged from the parents' stories regarding their search for support and resources to aid in parenting their children. Family therapists who are interested in working with families who adopt internationally from institutional settings can learn from the stories of parents.     

NARRATIVE PRACTICE AND THE COHERENCE OF PERSONAL STORIES

While the sociological analysis of personal stories is becoming more sophisticated, it would benefit from a refined appreciation for narrative practice. The theme of this article is that the coherence of stories and the experiences they convey are reflexively related to the manifold activities and the increasingly diverse conditions of storytelling. Drawing on ethnographically assembled story material, we offer an empirically sensitizing vocabulary to illustrate how practice constitutes coherence through the interplay of narrative composition and the local conditions of storytelling. The vocabulary high-lights the growing need to think of personal stories and their coherence as an active ensemble of narrative practice, now "owned" as much by the diverse auspices of story-telling as by the storyteller (Alasuutari 1997).     

Telling and Re‐telling Stories: The Use of Narrative and Drawing in a Group Intervention with Parents and Children in a Remote Aboriginal Community

The Let's Start Parent‐Child Program is a manualised parent‐child program which aims to improve educational, social and emotional outcomes for Aboriginal parents and their four‐ to seven‐year‐old children. It has been implemented in the Northern Territory, Australia on the Tiwi Islands and in Darwin since 2005. This paper outlines the adaptation of the program to include narrative approaches, the sharing of stories and the use of expressive arts as a way to build understanding between program leaders and participating families. An example from a recent program is used to illustrate how the sharing of stories and expressive use of art engages and binds group participants together. It supports parents to tell their own stories, to speak about their lived experience, to reconsider aspects of their own and their children's experiences and to achieve an increased awareness of their personal resources and a sense of self‐empowerment. The program is designed and delivered with sensitivity to individual parents, children and families, where cultural and interpersonal differences and different developmental and family situations can be taken into account.     

The healing magic of myth: Allegorical tales and the treatment of children of divorce

Children of divorce experience a sense of loss of the intact family which had stabilized their lives. Painful thoughts and feelings may result in defensive resistance of treatment techniques which deal too directly with their situation. This paper explores the use of allegorical tales in the treatment of children of divorced parents. It contrasts the use of such tales with traditional bibliotherapy and with Gardner's (1971) Mutual Story Telling, suggesting that myth and metaphor provide a road around resistance by presenting a cognitive bridge between themes common in the stories and the life experiences of the child of divorce.     

School-Choice Stories: The Role of Culture

This article uses data from in-depth interviews conducted with the parents of a sample of 88 ninth-grade students from public, private, Catholic, and Christian high schools in two different suburban communities. This research investigates the ways in which parents understand education and how they make sense of schooling options for their children. It shows both how families who choose schools make the selection among various alternatives and why some families seem not to choose schools. This research finds that the financial and information resources of families are not enough in and of themselves to explain school-choice behavior. While these resources are indeed used by families as they make school choices, such measures do not capture the cultural dimension of school choice. In this context culture is understood as the lens through which people make sense of the social world. The decision to activate resources and the direction in which those resources will be activated are mediated by culture. In particular, as these school-choice stories show, the school-choice decision is influenced by the past educational experiences of the parents and by their religious faith.     

Coming Out of the Family Closet: Stories of Adult Women with LGBTQ Parent(s)

Research about children of LGBTQ parent(s) tends to be politically interested and evaluative, assessing the degree to which children with LGBTQ parent(s) are being raised well. As a consequence, much of that research glosses over the distinct experiences of children with LGBTQ parent(s) and how they tell their own stories. This article attends to that shortcoming by detailing how some children with LGBTQ parent(s) construct their identities. We draw upon data from interviews with 26 adult-children, specifically young, white women who were born to, or adopted by, heterosexual parent(s) who later divorced and began living as LGBTQ. We analyze the children’s interviews as coming out narratives, detailing how many tell a story of coming out as a process of growing up and negotiating specific family closets. We then discuss how these are gendered and racialized narratives of coming out, reflecting the way racism and sexism intersect with homophobia and the stories told about experiencing it. We also suggest that these are stories of a particular generation of adult-children, reflecting specific families and the homophobia of the times. We end by suggesting how future generations of adult-children with LGBTQ parent(s) will likely narrate their identities differently.