Balancing caring and paid work in the UK: narrating ‘choices’ as first-time parents

Paid work is generally accepted as an important dimension of hegemonic masculinities and men's identities, which can become heightened when they become fathers. Changes in global economies together with educational shifts and other demographic patterns mean that paid work has become a significant feature of many women's lives too. Increasingly across Europe women who are mothers combine caring, domestic chores, and paid work. Using data from a qualitative longitudinal study on women's experiences of transition to first-time motherhood in the UK, this paper will explore how women narrate and reconcile their decisions either to return to paid work or not to, following the birth of their first child (Miller 2005). These findings are considered alongside a companion study on men's experiences of transition to first-time fatherhood (Miller 2011). The comparison shows that women articulate work and caring decisions in narratives which convey a sense of ‘guilt’, whilst the men are able to talk more freely – and acceptably – about ‘career progression’ and the importance of work to their identity and their new family. Even though recent research points to some changes in men's involvement in caring and women's increased activities in the work-place, particular aspects of these arrangements remain seemingly impervious to change.