In search of perfect motherhood for imperfect childhood – experiences of 22 Chinese mothers

Motherhood is subjectively defined and contextually based. This article describes and unfolds the experience of 22 Chinese mothers in Hong Kong in cultivating a sense of perfect motherhood for their children who have mental or behavioural problems that require psychiatric consultation. The mother, the significant others and the general public perceive the latter as a form of imperfection. The mothering experiences were full of frustrations, ambivalence, stresses and tensions, and were crystallized by the repeated theme of mother‐blaming and self‐blame by the mother. Despite the hardships, these Chinese mothers have gradually developed self‐confidence and pride, and have found ways to cope with the burden of care. Implications for practice are highlighted at the end of the paper.