| Abstract: | In counselling couples therapists frequently observe a pattern of interaction in which one person wants greater intimacy and closeness, whereas the other wants increased distance. This paper examines the distancer-pursuer pattern and its relationship to the triangulation of children, grandparents, in-laws or friends. In therapy, interventions target the distancer-pursuer pattern and problematic triangles. Therapy is based on an understanding of the evolution of the pattern in relation to gender, the initial context of the relationship and “life-time” and “situational” positions. |
